What we do………………………

No one likes to be told that they are wrong but then again if you care about your friends & where they are heading with their life you will still take that risk of giving them the 3rd degree at the cost of maybe them never talking to you again.

I’ve got 2 such friends in my life right now who needed a royal thrashing to try to wake them up from the world they live in.

Both in late 30’s –  one still a virgin who wants to get married & start a family, the other met a guy through an Indian marriage website & surprise surprise………………he does not want to get married.

What I’ve found in common amongst most of the friends I know who are that age is either lack of self confidence or a false sense of wellbeing about how things work out or are supposed to be couples with tons of negativity, lack of any self discipline, laziness & no respect for time.

Small changes in any of their circumstances can bring about so much of good change & making them realize just that can be a utopian task at times.

What do you tell someone who says – I cannot do that, that does not happen for me, but how, when, where, he does not call me, he says we are just friends, I’m working like a donkey, I’m not losing weight etc. etc. etc.

When you don’t want to believe in positive thinking – God, The Universe or whatever you choose to call it, you’ve defeated yourself at the very start. Monitoring what you think & making a conscious effort to shift your mind from thoughts to awareness is hard but once your master it, you will realize that you are living in the present & not worrying about the future even.

Whatever the end goal is, is easier to accomplish when broken down into small miniscule bite sized portions that are do-able and its important to take the time to sit down & identify what are those small steps that will lead you to the end goal.

Happiness also comes in many ways and the sooner we realize that he better it will be. Societal and parental pressure to be something, someone at a certain age has us thinking that they are right cos there is no one backing us up in our convictions & not much support or belief when we resist.

What’s the point? Continue to do what you want, what you believe, no one, I repeat no one is responsible for your happiness in life except you yourself. It is your life, you gotta live it & not let anyone else live it for you.

I don’t like to give advice anymore & have made a conscious decision not to whether is it solicited or unsolicited. It only makes me think more about people’s problems when they are more than capable of looking after themselves & I have my own life to live. Help when needed is always available, don’t get me wrong here but I think I’ve invested a lot of time in people who don’t want to make the change. I’m going to use that same time for me. Investing in myself for what I want to do and move forward. I cannot drag the world with me but I can go ahead myself and lead by example perhaps, if those friends want to open their eyes & do something for themselves………if not, I’m still living my life 🙂



What’s your life song…………………………

I love music and singing. I love waking up to music, listening to it morning, noon and night. For every season, for every reason, for every feeling and emotion; I have a favourite song. But there is that one song that encompasses time, space, weather, occassion and date. The one that sees me through the trial, jump over the hurdle, land safely on the other side, reach my goal and more than exemplifies my life and how grateful I am for everything in it.
“My song” looks like dancers, musicians and artists preparing for a big performance; practicing with all their effort and having fun while helping each other and you can see the happy anticipation on their faces for the big event 🙂 but isn’t this what life is all about?
“My song” reads like this and is sung by Josh Groban:-
When I am down and, oh my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then, I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up… To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up… To more than I can be.

There is no life – no life without its hunger;
Each restless heart beats so imperfectly;
But when you come and I am filled with wonder,
Sometimes, I think I glimpse eternity.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up… To more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up, to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong, when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up… To more than I can be.

You raise me up… To more than I can be.

I sing this when I’m down, when I’m happy, thankful, grateful, healthy, or just plain me.
This is my life song and I hope you have one too.

My middle name is Assumption……………

Most of us go through life led by the education imparted to us, the ideas put into our minds, the “universal” truths passed on to us by parents, grandparents, elders. When we come into this world, we are a blank slate and have to be taught how to walk, talk, sit, run, eat. Based on the “knowledge” that is fed into us, we develop further ideas, conceptions, notions, prejudices, fears, discriminations and most of all assumptions.
We are so conditioned by this “knowledge” in us that we hardly ever venture out of line or out of the box, save for being rebellious in our teens and trying everything from alcohol, red hair color, peeing our names into the snow and of course skinny dipping. Then, we are back to being “decent”, “model” citizens of society as we were trained to be, finding that all too popular nine to five job and grumbling about life for the rest of it.
Let’s assume, you were taught only the basic things in life like I mentioned earlier (eat, run, sit, talk) but none of the other values and ideas of people were ingrained in you. What would you be doing differently now? Would you:-
1) Talk to strangers
2) Marry the woman/man of your dreams even though they belonged to a different “caste”, “class”, “religion”
3) Be a “Director of Fun” at a museum rather than a lawyer, doctor or engineer? (This kid below got the job by the way)
4) Sing or dance in public when you received some great news

Do the things I mention in the list above make you happy or make you think of things you can still do right now to change what you live by and be happier? If the answer is yes and you are wondering what to do, its simple. Unassume everything that you’ve been told was the norm, is right, is the way to be, the place to go and start creating your life and destiny and assuming the new you 🙂

Start thinking. Are all strangers dangerous? Are you? No, right so there are others like you who are friends not foes. If you sing or dance in public will people think you are crazy? No, everyone will follow suit and join in your happiness or at least ask you what the good news is.

I literally turned my life around when I stopped assuming and started thinking. I always saw my middle name as a bane as other people thought it meant the noun of the verb “to assume” and found it a great source of hilarity, when in fact my middle name comes from the feast of Mother Mary that we celebrate of the 15th August every year when she was taken up into heaven, body and soul. The Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary. Once I accepted that fact for myself, and felt honoured by this name; the blessings flowed into my life.

So, I urge you all too to throw out the life “rules” you learnt and start living………from scratch, if you have to. As long as it makes you happy, it was meant to be.


You can be anything you want to be…………..

Have you ever tried doing something that is not typical or usual of you? Have you stepped outside your comfort zone and tried something really out of the blue? Well, I recommend doing that 🙂 and in doing so you will probably discover or rather uncover your hidden talents and potentials.

Over these last few weeks and months I tried crochet (I really didn’t like needlework in school), writing a book (my friends say I write well but to write a whole book, well I was nervous), Zumba (I am a shy dancer and dance-exercise with a group while I’m not good makes me cringe). I am doing pretty well at these activities now and I have decided to try some more.

1)  Line Dancing – oh well, there are classes at the local Church so I’m going to go along bravely and do it. It also means I get to meet new people and make friends and learn teamwork and dedication while dancing in a line 🙂

2) Baking – I’ve never baked a cake before and this weekend will be my very first one. I am so excited to go shop for ingredients and been busy sifting through recipes.

3) Still thinking about more things to do 🙂

Doing something new all the time makes me feel alive and of course ticks things of my bucket list that if held vertically is taller than the Eiffel Tower. I realised that if you put your mind to it and one hundred percent effort, you can do anything and be anything you want to be and in doing so, you are shaping yourself and………………….your destiny 🙂

We are products of what we make of ourselves inspite of the education, the opportunities of our childhood or past. Cos that’s all gone by and what is in front of you is the way to move forward, upward to a better, whole and complete you.

I can tell you right now that you CAN:-

Be the best singer in the Choir

Open that boutique and make a stunning profit

Lose that post-pregnany weight

Get rid of the negative people in your life

Ace that exam

Rock that job interview

Be a Yoga goddess

Buy those Christian Louboutin shoes

So, don’t stop darling and go get whatever you want and be whatever you want to be. Need some talking and support and love? I’m right here.

Cheers to you all,




Just for you :)

The Dash by Linda Ellis copyright 1996

I read of a man who stood to speak at the funeral of a friend. He referred to the dates on her tombstone, from the beginning…to the end.

He noted that first came the date of her birth and spoke of the following date with tears, but he said what mattered most of all was the dash between those years.

For that dash represents all the time that she spent alive on earth. And now only those who loved her know what that little line is worth.

For it matters not, how much we own, the cars…the house…the cash. What matters is how we live and love and how we spend our dash.

So, think about this long and hard. Are there things you’d like to change? For you never know how much time is left that can still be rearranged.

If we could just slow down enough to consider what’s true and real and always try to understand the way other people feel.

And be less quick to anger and show appreciation more and love the people in our lives like we’ve never loved before.

If we treat each other with respect and more often wear a smile, remembering that this special dash might only last a little while.

So, when your eulogy is being read, with your life’s actions to rehash… would you be proud of the things they say about how you spent YOUR dash?

What’s that place?

Walking down the village road in the cold, windy breeze, I entered half an hour earlier. Few people were scattered in the large seating space. Some chatting, some busy greeting friends and acquaintances.
Sunlight streaked in through the stained glass windows and I was impatiently looking at the minutes ticking away.

In strolled people – Gentlemen, Ladies, Sailors, Pirates, Old, Young, Sick, Healthy, Boys, Girls, Teenagers and Wenches…………..all came in and filled the benches.

In unison we arose and knelt, sang and bowed. Children playing wondered about the need to be quiet. Peace was offered all around and bread and wine were blest.

What is this place that we come to every Sunday? Do we come out of moral obligation, habit, fear, choice, happiness, routine? What do we get from it? Inner peace, words of wisdom, an hour with God?
What do we give to it? Some monetary contribution, volunteer service, our time?

There are those who do not come, do not believe, do not acknowledge. Yet some of us are regular attendees, cos we have at some point or the other experienced the wonders, miracles, the love of God. His saving grace, His forgiveness, His light.

What is this place that we troop into every Sunday, wearing our best, heads bowed in reverence? The Holy Church.
The house of God that offers us a main course of His Body and Blood with a side helping of peace, trimmings of forgiveness, unconditional love, patience, justice, understanding and wisdom; all served up fresh and free and with an unlimited “all you can have” offer.

Come and join in this celebration, this sacrifice being offered for our sake and salvation. Be a part of God as God is a part of you. He is in you. See him in you and in others around you. Feel his grace touch your life and acknowledge His works, then you too with the Gentlemen, Ladies, Sailors, Pirates, Old, Young, Sick, Healthy, Boys, Girls, Teenagers and Wenches…………..will come in and fill the benches.


Sabudana Khitchidi…………….

I’ve made this yesterday for the very first time on my life and Thank God, it came out beautifully 🙂

1 cup medium size sago grains – soaked in 1 cup water for 5 hours
1 chopped onion
1 finely chopped potato
1/2 inch piece of ginger finely chopped
1 green chili, finely chopped
Finely chopped green corriander
Lime wedges
Cumin seeds

In hot oil add cumin seeds, chili, ginger and let it fry. To this add the onions and finely chopped potatoes, cover and cook till the potatoes are done. Now add salt, turmeric powder and asafoetida and mix well. Into this goes the soaked and strained (if there is any excess water) sago (sabudana). Mix thoroughly, add corriander and squeeze lemon juice on it. Serve hot